Whats going on here?
by EnishiYukshiro
Summary: What happens when there is a mix up in the script and the main bad guy is being stood in for with someone else?


What's going on here?  
  
Authors note and disclaimer all rolled into one! Ha! : Ok, Kenshin does not belong to me. Neither do Karou and neither does.damn if you don't know which characters don't belong to me then you're all dumb.very dumb.  
  
Kaoru sighs as she holds her sakabatou out to wait for her opponent. In the little shrine Kenshin is on his knees, holding his throat and looking like he can't breath. He's making all these choking sounds and occasionally saying, "Karou-dono." And overall looking rather pathetic.  
  
Kaoru sighs and looks at her wrist impatiently. No one really knows why she is looking at her wrist. This is the meji area after all and no one has a wristwatch. Its dark anyway and even if they did have wrist watches I really doubt that they would have the little light up digital watches that you can tell time in the dark with. Even if they did Karou would be too poor to afford one and.well anyway someone comes running up breathing heavily. After a moment of catching his breath he straightens up and smiles. He is BGIT. BGIT means Bad Guy In Training.  
  
"Hello. I am BGIT. BGIT means Bad Guy In Training." BGIT says.  
  
"Ka...our...do...no." Kenshin says. Then Kenshin coughs.  
  
"I am bad guy in training number 606!" BGIT proclaims. He strikes a stupid pose looking like a Team Rocket reject. "I may have failed all of my bad guy exams and gotten the lowest score in the school, but I will still be able to do this scene!"  
  
"Okay. Let's just do this." Karou says. She holds the sakabatou out in a fighting position. "Wait a moment." BGIT says. He takes out a bag that was slung over his shoulder and sets it one the ground. He rummages through the bag for a moment before pulling out a roll of toilet paper. I don't think they had toilet paper back then but, well they didn't have glow in the dark digital watches either so.wait...er.  
  
Anyway BGIT starts to wrap the Ultra Charman around his head and arms.and legs.and ends up looking like a mummy man. Kaoru sweatdrops. "Ano.what are you doing?" She asked.  
  
"Getting into character!" BGIT states happily. (Note to all you readers. BGIT failed all his bad guy exams)  
  
"You're supposed to be Jineh! This is the scene from the beginning of the series where Jineh has Kenshin all trapped and I, Kaoru have to come in and save him! You're not Shishio! Get it right!"  
  
BGIT smiles and puts the toilet paper away. "Alright then!" BGIT starts to dig around in his prop bag again. He pulls out a pair of cool sunglasses (note that it is the middle of the night.) and gets a serious look. "Battousai! For my sister, I will take my revenge on you!"  
  
"Kaoru-dono." Kenshin coughs.  
  
"What! You're JINEH! Not Enishi!" Kaoru yells. Now she's getting really mad.  
  
BGIT looks a little dismayed. He really liked the sunglasses, which really did not belong in the meji area any more than the Charman ultra toilet paper or the glow in the dark digital watch but got actually put in the series anyway and.um. So BGIT clears his throat and yells "Run Forest! Run!"  
  
Kaoru balks and falls over anime-style. "NO! You're Jineh! Not Jenny!"  
  
"Karo.u.do.no." Kenshin coughs.  
  
"Shut up!" Mad Kaoru yells.  
  
"..." Says Kenshin. Right now Kenshin wants to 'oro' but he can't. He's too busy doing other stuff. Yeah.um.like kneeling and coughing and.um...  
  
"Never mind!" Mad Kaoru yells. "Just kneel there!" She says pointing at the ground.  
  
"..okay." Says BGIT. Poor BGIT. He was trying so hard to do well. He's just stupid. So he kneels where Kaoru told him.  
  
"For Kenshin's sake I'll become the Hitokiri once more!" Karou says.  
  
"Kaoru...do..."  
  
"I SAID SHUT UP!"  
  
"..." She starts to swing the sword down but a really panicky BGIT stops her.  
  
"Ano...wait, isn't there something wrong with this whole thing?"  
  
"You're right." Kaoru realized. BGIT breathed a sigh of relief. "The sword is turned backwards." BGIT looks really panicky as Kaoru flips the reverse blade sword around to the sharp side.  
  
BGIT 'gacks' "Gack!" Said BGIT.  
  
So Kaoru starts to swing the sakabatou down again before someone from offstage yells 'cut'.  
  
"CUT!" Yelled someone from offstage. It was the director because the director is the one who yells 'cut'. "This is all wrong! How could you people mess the scene up this much!"  
  
"Kaoru...do...no." Kenshin coughs.  
  
"CUT! CUT!" The director yelled again. The director's job was to yell cut when the scene needed to be stopped. I think the director does other stuff too. Like sits in the director's chair. "Kaoru, you're supposed to be the one on the ground choking and stuff! Kenshin, you're supposed.um -sweatdrops- you can breath now you know."  
  
Kenshin gasps for air. "You were really holding your breath for the whole scene?" BGIT asked.  
  
"Hai. Hai." Kenshin gasped. Right now Kenshin is blue. Of course no one can really see the fact that he's blue because it's dark. Although they might be able to see if they had one of those light up digital watches. But they don't because it's the meji era. They don't have light up digital watches in the meji era.  
  
"Never mind this whole thing!" The director yelled. Directors yell a lot. Some directors even have digital watches. "We'll just re-shoot the whole thing tomorrow." Everyone seemed to like this idea. They all got up to go offstage when BGIT jumped up happily.  
  
"Wait! I finally got my character!" He yelled. He pulled a cigarette from the little prop bag. "My motto is Aku Zoku Zan!"  
  
... ...... ........... Everyone stares blankly for a moment.  
  
"...oro?"  
  
The end.  
  
Ok, so this is actually based off a skit that we did at a Halloween party meeting of our anime club. It was funny. People laughed. It was fun. I was BGIT ^_^ So, what did you think of this? Liked it, hated it? Oh, and please don't write this whole critical review! You do know this was a tasteless meaningless comedy, ne? Ne? arugh! They're gonna try to kill me again! Mommy! 


End file.
